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Your Office Coach: Passed over? Take action, not offense
Q: I have worked at my company for more than 20 years. Whenever I apply for a new position, I am passed over. I think it's because I'm older-looking and lack the "babe-ness" of younger women. What do you think?
A: If the fast-track women at your company resemble centerfolds, then you may be onto something. But let's not jump to that conclusion too quickly. After all, your 20 years should provide some valuable assets: a wealth of knowledge, a track record of loyalty and a network of valuable relationships.
To change this situation, you must develop an action plan. First, ask yourself some relevant questions. Are you seen as an outstanding performer in your job? Do you get along well with managers and co-workers? Have you kept up with technological changes? Are you applying for positions that match your qualifications?
An enthusiastic "yes!" is the desired answer. Anything less is a clue to the problem.
Next, you need honest feedback from a trustworthy person in management or human resources. Here's the agenda for that conversation: 1) identify jobs that you are qualified for and interested in; 2) describe how your years of experience can add value in those positions; and 3) ask what specific things you can do to increase your odds of being hired.
You may get some feedback that you don't want to hear. But pay attention. A job change is not in your future unless decision-makers feel good about both your performance and your working relationships.
Finally, target one or two positions as a goal and develop action plans for attaining them.
Q: How do you get co-workers to stop singing in their cubicles? The noise is driving me nuts!
A: Your singing colleagues probably don't mean to be annoying; they're just being themselves. Some people enjoy background noise and chatter, while others find it terribly distracting.
Someone obviously has to talk to the songbirds. The logical nominee would be either you or their manager. If you choose the do-it-yourself option, bring up the subject in a pleasant, friendly manner. A communication technique called "I-statements" can set a positive tone.
With an I-statement, your goal is not to criticize the other person but to describe the problem you are having. For example: "I have a favor to ask. I have a hard time concentrating when there's background noise, and, even though your singing is very cheerful, it's distracting for me. I would appreciate it if the singing could be limited to break times."
If the idea of a direct conversation makes you queasy, then ask the manager for help. Describe how the singing affects your own work and mention any other business concerns - for example, the impression that might be made on customers or other visitors to the office. Make this a problem-solving conversation, not a gripe session.
Don't expect complete silence. With luck, you might at least reduce the volume.
- Marie G. McIntyre is an Atlanta-based workplace coach. Her weekly column is syndicated by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service. Send questions at www.yourofficecoach.com.
