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Deal gently with scatterbrain boss
Q: My manager thinks I can read her mind. She will come rushing up, interrupt my work and say something like, "Did he come pick it up?" I have no idea what she's talking about, so I ask what she means. She acts like I'm an idiot for not understanding her.
This goes on all the time, and I'm getting more and more irritated. How can I deal with this weird communication technique?
A: Sounds like your boss is a bit of a scatterbrain. She may be an otherwise intelligent woman who has a disorganized thinking style.
Nonlinear thinkers often make spontaneous remarks that seem completely off-the-wall. And they sometimes believe that they've verbalized thoughts that were never actually spoken. If you are a structured and orderly person, these habits will drive you crazy.
Because you work for this erratic communicator, try to control your irritation. When she asks "Did he come pick it up?," avoid frustrated responses like "I have no idea what you're talking about!" Instead, you might reply "No one has picked anything up today" or "John picked up the budget report." Then see what she says next.
Q: I recently was let go from a position that I held for 25 years. I was told that the corporate office would be broken up and the entire company restructured. Three months later, my layoff is the only move that has been made.
My job performance and work ethic were much better than those of many of my co-workers. I also had seniority over people who still hold positions with the company. I would like to ask the owner some questions about my layoff.
Because I have not yet found another job, I'm afraid that confronting the owner might damage the reference he would give to prospective employers. Should I forget my questions until I have secured employment elsewhere?
A: Suddenly losing your job after 25 years must be terribly upsetting. But you are smart to control your emotions in the interest of getting a favorable reference.
Ask your former employer if he will give you a letter of reference to use during job interviews. That will get him to verify, on the record, that you were terminated because of a layoff, not poor performance. This fact will be critically important to anyone who might hire you.
When you are safely settled in a new position, meet with your former boss to discuss the termination. He still may not give you the straight story, but perhaps you can read between the lines. Once you have a new job, you may be less interested in exploring your departure from the previous one.
- Marie G. McIntyre is an Atlanta-based workplace coach. Her weekly column is syndicated by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service. Send questions at www.yourofficecoach.com.
